Post By: Berit Kauffeldt | Tuesday, June 9, 2020

sport psychology performance STRESS TRANSITION

Can you feel the wind of change blowing through your life right now? I clearly can. If you feel the same, this goes out to both of us.

Just a reminder in the beginning: there will be a door opening, right when you need it, life will find a way to express through you and YES, you absolutely have the right to be happy!

This been said, let's have a look on the psychological perspective and how to handle uncertainties best. If one thing is clear about human minds: we don't like uncertainty, we don't like to not know what's coming next, we love having plans and we love security.

That's the reason why some of us are clinging to the weather forecast or astrology, it gives us a sense of knowing what the future might bring and of being prepared for it. That's also why many people stay in jobs they don't like, live in apartments they don't feel comfortable in or keep a relationship that's not supporting them – it's freaking scary that there could be nothing replacing it, the idea that nothing could fill the empty spot. If you done it anyways, if you took the terrifying decision, because it's best for you – congratulations from the bottom of my heart!

While I walked through some challenging times and life changes myself, plus studying psychology and always trying to live an mindful and purposeful life, I figured some things out. Here is how to navigate safely and serenely through this time:

1. Mindset:

Walk with poise and have an open and humble mindset. There is nobody in this world who's better than you are… and nobody who‘s less worthy than you are. This is the base for everything coming.

Stay focused and flexible in your mind at the same time. This works out if you go in the direction of your values (see point 2) and are open to the opportunities, that show up on this road.

Because we want security we tend to grab the first thing, that shows up. Stay serene, stay calm, stay patient - the right thing will show up. And most important: Stay true to yourself.

2. What would you do, if money, reputation and fear would't exist?

How would your day look like? Which people would surround you? What would be the most important thing for you? How would you feel? Journal about those questions and let your hand write, more than your brain. Your body and soul have an intelligence that's way beyond the possibilities your logical mind can process – use it.

This exercise will help you connecting to your core values and wishes. Let them be your compass. Writing them down and looking at them daily can be extremely powerful. They are your personal ground, your starting and your ending point, your guideline and your safety anchor. They give you a direction, while goals are only intermediate points at this direction.

Maybe during this exercise there came up also feeling, you would love to feel or situations you would admire to experience. Keep them in your mind and start to feel them daily during your morning routine (see point 4)

3. Demystify your fears

Having fear is the most normal thing in the world of a human being – the species also you belong to. It saved your life a thousand times and also your ancestor's life – well done so far, thank your fear for being still alive and able to read/write this blog.

You can think about your fear like a person living inside of you. What is the story, it tells you? Is it a true story? What does it want to protect you from? When did the fear start to tell this story? Is it still valuable or just a scary fairy tale? How can you meet the need of the "Fear Person“ inside you and still live your life fully? Write that down. What can you learn from it?

Accept the fear, because it's just a part of you. Remember: it's you, who is the captain of the boat and not the fear. But while you are a good captain, you take care of everybody's need, for your body's, for your mind's and also for your fear's needs.

4. Building a morning routine

This works so well, because it gives you a kind of safety, before going to bed you'll know how the next morning starts and second because a morning routine aligns your body, mind and soul to walk in same direction with trust. Starting your day right is crucial.

Of course your morning routine is not mine, but here are some ingredients which can be beneficial: no phone until you finished the routine, meditation of any kind, Pranyama, Yoga, Journal about things you are grateful for, write down, your focus of the day, things you are looking forward to that day and feelings that you wish to have more from in your life. Also dancing or moving your body in the mood you have at that moment can be very useful. You can also use the healing element of water. Or in form of a cold shower (or also warm) or in rinsing your face mindfully. Find the routine that works best for you and practice it. Make adjustments if needed. In the end of your routine you should feel focused, centered and at ease.

These hints and descriptions are not some easy to take medicine and you'll feel awesome, but trust me, they can bring you safely through any kind challenge you might face and can change the perspective how you see the world. Give it a try on your own or ask an expert for help.

For any kind of question, comment or experience report – I'm here. Happy if I can help.

Sending you love and light,